请教各位懂这方面的人,请帮忙看一下这个英语作文有什么问题没有,我在这里谢谢了

请教各位懂这方面的人,请帮忙看一下这个英语作文有什么问题没有,我在这里谢谢了
MY happy time during my winter vacation
I had a good time during my winter vacation.My grandfather lived in a small mountain village,so I went to call on them in the winter vacation.That village is very small,but I could breathe fresh air and smell the sweet flowers,there.We ate water dumplings every day.They tasted delicious.In the evening I watched TV with my family.I had a happy time there!
That was my happy time during the winter vacation.
MY happy time during my winter vacation
During my winter vacations,l was happy.My grandparents lived in a small village,so l went to visit them during my winter holidays.That villge was very small.l could breathe fresh air and smell flowers.I ate dumplings every day,they were delicious.At night,my family and l watched TV together.l enjoyed myself there。

你真棒,写得非常好!
只有一点点小错误,
就是:My grandfather lived in a small mountain village.
这句话最好用一般现在时态来表示一个客观事实.
你用的一般过去时,说明他过去住在那儿,难道他现在不住那儿了吗?
所以建议将lived 改成:lives .
另外,call on them 应改为call on him.
因为你前面用的主语是My grandfather ,因此这儿应用him来指代My grandfather .
当然,你也可以不改call on them ,而将前面的My grandfather 改成My grandparents,这样也是可以的.
最后,将flowers,there之间的逗号去掉就可以了.
再问： MY happy time during my winter vacation During my winter vacations,l was happy.My grandparents lived in a small village,so l went to visit them during my winter holidays.That villge was very small.l could breathe fresh air and smell flowers.I ate dumplings every day,they were delicious.At night,my family and l watched TV together.l enjoyed myself there.
再答： 直接给你改正后的全文吧, 这样回答起来更快一点: MY happy time during my winter vacation During my winter [vacations--vacation],l was happy.My grandparents [lived--lives] in a small village, so l went to visit them during my winter holidays. That villge was very small.l could breathe fresh air and smell [原文中的the sweet最好不要去掉] flowers. I ate dumplings every day, [并列句,要加上and] they were delicious. At night,my family and l watched TV together. l enjoyed myself there.
再问： 我说的是这篇帮忙改下，谢谢
再答： 我已经改了嘛, 那就不加[原文中的the sweet最好不要去掉] 这个了, [lived--live], 其它见上面改的.
再问： [并列句,要加上and] 是在哪里加
再答： 在they were delicious这句前面加and. 好,我现在把重新改过的全文给出来: MY happy time during my winter vacation During my winter vacation, l was happy. My grandparents live in a small village, so l went to visit them during my winter holidays. That villge is very small, but l could breathe fresh air and smell flowers. I ate dumplings every day, and they were delicious. At night, my family and l watched TV together. l enjoyed myself there.
再问： 我想让这篇作文最后加一句‘这就是我寒假的快乐时光’这句话，麻烦了
再答： 你上面不是有吗? 就用那句就可以了: That was my happy time during the winter vacation.