英语作文修改志愿者日要到了,学校又要组织志愿者献爱心活动.请回顾一下去年你在IVD做了那些事情,并根据自己的爱好及特长选

英语作文修改志愿者日要到了,学校又要组织志愿者献爱心活动.请回顾一下去年你在IVD做了那些事情,并根据自己的爱好及特长选择一项
IVD is coming again,now I still remember the meaningful things we did last year.
Last year,my classmates and I spent an afternoon visiting the local home for the elderly.We sang songs and played games with the old people.During our visit,the home was full of the sound of laughter.Some of them were in poor health,so they couldn’t go outside and the visits by us brought sunshine into their lives.
For this year’s IVD,I came up with a plan.We will go to the Orphanage and wrap colorful packages filled with toys,clothes,and school suppliers,each with a child’s name.I want all of them to know they are special and weren’t forgotten.I can imagine when they open their packages,their faces beam and their bright smiles light up the room.
In my view,doing volunteer work is a great way to explore different careers and made me experience that giving is receiving.I know that when you help others,you become like a pebble thrown into a pond.With each ripple you create,you spread love that continues to give.
希望老师帮忙修改一下这篇作文的时态、语法问题,以及看看这两篇作文是否有地方写得不全面什么的,总感觉详略有些问题,观点写得有点少,但又不知道加什么,所以希望老师给补充几句好的观点.还有,希望修改后的作文能达到11分以上.o(∩_∩)o

IVD又来了,现在我还记得去年我们做有意义的事.
去年,我和我的同学们花了一个下午的老人参观当地的家庭.我们唱歌、玩游戏,老年人.我们访问期间,家里充满了笑声.他们中的一些人身体不好,所以他们不能到外面去,我们参观了阳光进入他们的生活.
今年的椎间盘,我想出了一个计划.我们将去孤儿院,包装五颜六色的包装,填充玩具,衣服,和学校的供应商,每一个孩子的名字.我希望所有人知道他们是特殊的,不忘记.我可以想象,当他们打开他们的计划,他们的脸梁和他们灿烂的笑容照亮了房间.
在我看来,做志愿者的工作是探索不同的职业生涯中一个伟大的方式,让我的经验,给正在接收.我知道,当你帮助别人,你就变成了一个石子投入池塘.每个波纹你创造,你传播爱,继续给
自己看看顺不顺,我建议你改一改!